By Pat Douglas
Meet Monster. Meet Judy. Two humans who don’t like each other much, but together must fight dragons, fire-breathing felines, trolls, Inuit walrus dogs, and a crazy cat lady – for the future of the universe.
Monster runs a pest control agency. He’s overworked and has domestic troubles – like having the girlfriend from hell.
Judy works the night shift at the local Food Plus Mart. Not the most glamorous life, but she’s happy. No one bothers her and if she has to spell things out for the night manager every now and again, so be it.
But when Judy finds a Yeti in the freezer aisle eating all the Rocky Road, her life collides with Monster’s. He doesn’t catch raccoons – he catches the things that go bump in the night. Things like ogres, trolls, and dragons.
Oh, and his girlfriend from Hell? She actually is from Hell.
Okay, first off… Monster isn’t actually a bizarro novel. I know what you are thinking: Why did you post the review about it here at Bizarro Central? Well hear me out. First, I assume that most of you are avid readers in general. It’s more of a fantasy novel, but if you’re a bizarro fan, I’ll say that there are lots of details in Monster that scream bizarre. Examples: The opening scene is of a yeti in a grocery store eating all the ice cream, but he only likes a special kind. One of the main characters changes colors every day. Another is a man made of paper, and yes, at some point he does catch on fire a little bit. Also, the cell phones in this book are actually babies! It may not be bizarro, but it’s bizarre enough to be worthy here at BC.
Second, I assume that a lot of you guys are also writers, and if you’re a writer of bizarro fiction this book would be a perfect inspirational read for thinking outside of the box. If writing bizarro is already thinking outside of the box, then reading this book for inspiration would be thinking outside of the outside (if that makes sense). This novel is a wacky ride for any lover of ‘different’. It starts out with a fast pace and keeps a steady rhythm throughout.
Have a book you want reviewed?
My name is Pat and I frequently stop in with bizarro book reviews. The types of reviews I do are simple, short, and to the point. If you want me to review your book just shoot me a message. My goal is to do at least one Bizarro Central Review a month. If I can get around to more than that, awesome. But no promises. You can check me out at indie-inside.com
By Sam Reeve
This is the first Weekly Weird Art post of 2013, and today’s artist is most definitely in my top ten of favourite artists of all time. I am more in love with Scott Hove’s work than I know how to express. His vicious-looking cakes are a visual treat like none other.
Scott creates both sculptures and huge Cakeland installations. He also paints and does murals, though I’m a much bigger fan of the Cakeland stuff. Check out his work below, or visit his website here.
By Sam Reeve
Katakata (Rattle Rattle) is one of three shorts that make up the anthology film Unholy Women. I happened to come across it by its lonesome in Youtubeland, so I haven’t seen the other ones. This one wasn’t a total waste of 30 minutes so it’s worth checking out the whole movie.
Katakata is about a young woman, Kanako, who returns from a date with her fiance, only to be struck on the head by something falling outside her apartment building. She wakes up and continues on, but while getting ready for bed she hears a creepy voice in her apartment, then promptly receives a call from her fiance saying his ex-wife tried to kill him. A knife-wielding woman in red attacks Kanako and chases her around the apartment complex. At first you think she’s human and the ex-wife of her fiance, but that theory is quickly dashed to pieces when she starts moving her body in inhuman ways, crawls around on ceilings, and is able to appear out of nowhere.
Oh, and she also reveals her true form. Pretty fetching, if I do say so myself.
WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH IT: Besides the fact that you get to watch this hottie (pictured above) chase around an innocent girl, I got nothing. But really, it had its freaky parts: the rattling sound you heard each time the monster lady appeared was like their own version of Jason’s weird hushing noise in Friday the 13th, and they don’t really let up for very long on the horror, so it’s an intense ride.
WHAT DIDN’T WORK: The ending was pretty cliche. I won’t give it away, because it’ll ruin the first 80% of the movie, which was pretty good. Actually there was kind of a double whammy of cliche at the end, so that was a bummer.
You should still give Katakata a shot, it’s worth the time and good for a quick dose of j-horror. I would also recommend watching all of Unholy Women. I haven’t yet, but the premise for the second one seems hilarious (man must go on date with boss’s sister, who wears a burlap sack during the entire evening out, then shit gets weirder).
Below is Katakata with subtitles in English. Enjoy!