Bizarro Pulp Press presents… A showcase of the written word that represents the best of the weird and the grotesque; More Bizarro Than Bizarro is a gallery of the strange and unusual, including possibly-dead detectives, a beer-head invasion, some especially delicious cookies, the dream of Jackie Kennedy, and of course, the best story of a talking penis ever written in the history of classical literature.
Get it here
Two anthologies have recently arrived, each featuring some familiar names from the bizarro scene.
First, Lee Widener has a story called He Was So Old in the latest issue of Neo-opsis Science Fiction Magazine.
From Justin Grimbol and Atlatl Press comes a book of poetry about Upstate New York and marriage: Mud Season.
Next, Moses Guttchenridder has several problems. His business, Macramania, is going under. His lovelife is in the toilet. Oh, and he has been forced into helping a murderous garden gnome take his revenge on the brothers of a fraternity who make sport out of destroying garden gnomes. The only spot of good news is that he has been chosen at random to become the new face of Krap-Wad Toilet Paper, replacing their beloved spokesanimal, Tenderbear, who has been arrested for drunk driving. The new head of Krap-Wad, Regan Moribund, falls in love Moses, but their relationship is put immediately in jeopardy when Tenderbear escapes his jail cell and goes on a murderous rampage, killing everyone who crosses his path. The former head of Krap-Wad toilet paper, Giles Moribund, attempts to re-take over the company by hiring a hitman, Asigao, to kill his daughter, Regan. When Moses, Regan, Giles, Asiago, the muderous gnome and several others converge on New York City, it becomes a bloody masacre to see who will remain on top of the dangerous toilet paper world. At turns humorous and horrifying, Tenderbear Goes Apeshit is another twisted offering from the mind of Bix Skahill (Babes in Gangland and Dope Tits). Get it here!
And finally, Mother’s Revenge: A Dark and Bizarre Anthology of Global Proportions. What happens when you abuse your mother? It’s not pretty. It’s not nice. And she can get downright mean and nasty if you don’t straighten up and make amends. In this mixed genre group of eco-tales, thirty-two authors from around the globe offer up some lessons in why it’s wise to be kind to Mother Earth. Read and take heed. Your very life may depend on it!
Clash Books has released an anthology based on the music of the immortal WU-TANG CLAN. The cover is amazing, the contributors are amazing, and you can get your copy at Amazon. A full table of contents is located below.
An eclectic collection of Crime, Horror, Bizarro, Science Fiction, Ninja Action, Noir, Mythos, and Literary Fiction stories, that gives tribute to one of the best Hip-Hop groups of all time.
Gabino Iglesias: BIG GHETTO BOYS
Charles Austin Muir: THE RAEKWONOMICON
Joshua Chaplinsky: SUPREME MATHEMATICS: A CIPHER
Mame Bougouma Diene: BEATS, BONES, & BRISKET
Jeremy Thompson: WU-TANGIBLE
J.C. Carter: ABBOT OF THE WHITE LOTUS
Loren Kleinman: SUNSHINE
Robert Dean: THE WORLD FELL BENEATH THE BROKEN CONCRETE
Andy Rausch: THE NIGHT OL’ DIRTY BASTARD CAME TO HOBOKEN
Tom Leins: INCARCERATED SCARFACES
Laura Lee Bahr: THE ONE WHO SWALLOWS THE SEA
David Osborne: PCP & METH & MOLLY & ALCOHOL, & NO SLEEP
S.L. Dixon: THE RIGHTEOUS HUNT
Aaron Besson: HELLRZA
Sergio Hernandez: LINX
Rooster Republic Press has just launched the latest volume of their flagship anthology series, Tall Tales with Short Cocks. It’s available on Amazon and features a wide array of authors, including: Bradley Sands, Danger Slater, Douglas Hackle, Jessica McHugh, Andrew Wayne Adams, Jon Konrath, Jeff Burk, Dustin Reade, Jamie Grefe, David W Barbee, Madeleine Swann, John McNee, Nicholaus Patnaude, Crystal Babb, Shamus McCarty, Edmund Colell, MP Johnson, Mike Fugere Jr. and Timothy W. Long.
Editor G. Arthur Brown had this to say:
In the fifth installment of Rooster Republic’s flagship anthology series, we have some really tremendous fiction. It’s great. You can’t beat fiction like this. A lot of kids come up to me and they tell me how great they think this fiction is. I believe them. Believe me, it’s a great collection with some fantastic authors giving us their best work. I believe me. Why don’t you? You too good for all this fun, freaky, and far-out fiction? Maybe go read a book about bird watching, you voyeuristic pervert. This anthology is for connoisseurs who are sick of watching birds. They want to look at words—not at our fine feathered friends. Though, if I’m being honest, I’ve never met a bird I would call my friend. Sure, those doves helped me move. BUT I GAVE THEM BIRDSEED. Real friends don’t demand food from you. They just help you move, wish you luck, and then leave forever until you need them again. The stories in this anthology will be great friends. You can read them, put them back on the shelf, and pull them out whenever you feel like it. Or if you don’t feel like it, they aren’t going to call you up and be all like, “Hey, wanna get something to eat at that new taco cart I saw on the corner of Johnson and Johnson?” That would be the end of American fiction, I can tell you. Not that all the authors in this collection are Americans. Some are UKish, and some, I assume, are also good people. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Chickens Are Birds. Rooster Republic 2016!!!!!
By Sam Reeve
My rating: 6.5/10
Directed by the legendary Mario Bava, Black Sabbath is quite a noteworthy horror anthology film. The piece titled The Wurdulak stars the equally legendary Boris Karloff, and all the actresses from the movie are total babes. You can’t go wrong!
Fun fact: the famous band Black Sabbath apparently named themselves after this film.
In The Telephone we have a beautiful woman who’s terrorized by phone calls and a vengeful acquaintance. In The Wurdulak, Boris Karloff comes back as a vampire and attacks his family of peasants. Our final piece, The Drop of Water, is a ghostly tale about a nurse who steals a ring from a dead woman and gets haunted.
All three are fairly suspenseful and well acted, but the final one was probably the creepiest. The lady’s corpse had a pretty terrifying expression on her face:
By Sam Reeve
My rating: 6/10
Coffin Joe is the alter ego of the Brazilian horror legend José Marins. He has appeared in many of his own films as this character, but despite the title, Coffin Joe is not present in this anthology of short horror tales. He does, however, make an appearance in the third segment as an evil professor with a seriously bad wig and eyebrow combo.
Fun fact: Coffin Joe and the professor both have extremely long fingernails, which are real. Marins would grow them out several inches for his movies.
The first tale is of a doll maker and his daughters, whose shop is broken into by some young hooligans looking for money and sex. The second is a dialogue-free story about a hobo/balloon vendor who becomes obsessed with a woman and follows her around for some time, even breaking into her tomb once she dies. The third is about a crazy professor (played by Marins) who tortures people into agreeing with/proving his theory that animal instincts are ever-present in people and love isn’t real.
I thought the first and third segments were the best, though the middle one had some redeeming moments that were quite funny. All three had a lot of T&A, to the point of it being truly hilarious. Many times the camera followed someone who walked past it and zoomed in on their ass, and I’m pretty sure once it was a guy. The special effects and sets were low-budget and pretty cheesy, but laughing at those bits made the slow parts bearable. Over all, it’s worth seeing, especially knowing what a legend José Marins is in the horror genre.
Below is the full movie with English subtitles. Feel free to skip to the 6-minute mark, as the intro and opening credits were almost unbearably long and boring.