THOSE CLOSEST TO MY HEART
Behold, my adopted family. They took me in when no one else wanted me, saved me from a wanton and unchecked life of crime and addiction on the streets. For their intervention, I am forever grateful. They made me into the man I am today.
I’d like to take the time to tell you a little about these blubbery angels, from left to right:
ROGER lacks in the tusk-department, but his sheer intelligence more than compensates. He’s the only walrus I know who can solve a Rubik’s Cube—with his mind. He’s an ace at Chinese Checkers, too.
TOM is a total heartthrob. His tusks are so thick and long; all the cows love him. They tell me his pinkish splotches are especially attractive, and that his vibrissae tickles their faces in magical, impossible to imitate ways.
DANNY is a giver. His floe always has room for one more. He’d take the hide off his back and fashion it into a coat for you, if he could. Were he starving, he’d surrender his last bite to a needy other. He’s just that kind of walrus.
(*NOTE: I give these guys anglicized names, as what they call themselves cannot be uttered in my native tongue.)
This entry was posted on August 7, 2012 by kevinldonihe. It was filed under Bizarro authors, Kevin L. Donihe, Walrus and was tagged with squid vs walrus, walrus fiction, walrus stories, walrus tales, walrus week.